Time For Some Hairy Literature Part 2

Chest Shaving on Nivea's Website

HELL. NO. Last week, The New York Times has published a great article on male body depilation, focusing on our beloved chests and pits area. Do not proceed if you have a weak stomach! Although it is truly heartbreaking to read on, I feel that it is my sole responsibility to share this with you guys. We need to acknowledge the two major follicle nemesis that are Nivea and Gillette that we LOVE furry men and you don’t have to look like a prepubescent 12-year-old to get the girls (or guys)!

Here are some quotes from the article. Just sad.

Little research has been done on male body depilation. But a 2005 study published in the journal Sex Roles found that 63.6 percent of 118 men at the University of South Florida said they trimmed or removed body hair below the neck to be hygienic and attractive.

Smooth chests are attractive? Since when?

And in a yet-to-be-published survey of 364 male students at the same university, more than 80 percent said they engaged in body depilation, said Michael Boroughs, the lead author of both studies and a graduate student in psychology.

This is definitely dangerous. I think I’m going to get sick.

In May, Gillette started a series of how-to and why-do-it videos online suggesting that men go further with body shaving. The rationale varied by part. Chest? “A sweater should be bought not grown.” Armpits? “An empty stable smells better than a full one.” And their coup de grâce is the groin: “Trees look taller when there’s no underbrush.”

That’s it. We need to launch a CRUSADE on Gillette and Nivea. They are clearly run by none other than the DEVIL himself. Nivea didn’t wan’t to fall behind on the evil doings, so they have posted a very graphic (warning: NSFHCL*) form of this mutilation process with tutorials(!!!) on their Active3 product website. Blasphemy!

Here are some caps of the “before”. Can someone please tell me what exactly is wrong with this fuzzy hunk in the first place?!? Oh, his name is Jislain Duval just in case (you know you wanna Google).

Jislain Duval Shirtless

Jislain Duval Shirtless

Jislain Duval Shirtless

Okay, depilation in progress!

Jislain Duval Shirtless

Jislain Duval Shirtless

Jislain Duval Shirtless

Jislain Duval Shirtless

Jislain Duval Shirtless

Jislain Duval Shirtless

Jislain Duval Shirtless

Jislain Duval Shirtless

Jislain Duval Shirtless

Jislain Duval Shirtless

Jislain Duval Shirtless

Jislain Duval Shirtless

Jislain Duval Shirtless

Jislain Duval Shirtless

Jislain Duval Shirtless

Jislain Duval Shirtless

Mmmm… Free range chicken anyone?

Jislain Duval Shirtless

Here is a video of how to shave your groin by Gillette. Thank God they used animation to demonstrate this.

I need to sit down, have a drink or ten and call my therapist. Thanks Joe (as always) for the heads up!

* Not Safe For Hairy Chests Lovers

  • Oh my, I’m in shock and totally outraged. What a shame, he was sucha hottie…

    [j]

  • Me

    I like smooth guys, but he should’ve left something! Smooth chest = YES! Armpits = hmmm…………..

  • Brian

    I’ll take smooth over hairy anyday, great post!

  • Please hide this videos from the World T_T
    We need hairy guys!

  • boydspence

    Smooth or Hairy, that’s that question.

    Being kind of hairy myself i sometimes wish i was smooth. Shaving armpits… yeah don’t think so.

  • Melissa

    *cries* I love hairy chests and hairy armpits. There’s nothing sexier than a natural man. I hope this trend dies soon.

  • DoverDavid

    Why stop there, do the legs, arms and pubes and transform yourself into a woman while your at it!

  • WarpedRecord

    Square: I normally love your site, but these shots are downright pornographic!

    I’m with DoverDavid and (almost) everyone else here. Why not just transform your penis into a vagina (mangina?) while you’re at it? Hair makes the man.

  • KarmaLysing

    This is the follicular equivalent of Fair (haha) Isaacs increasing their customer base by convincing everyone and their uncle that a three digit number represents your value as a human being, and equally as EVIL.

    FOR SHAME, Gilette and Nivea. FOR. SHAME.

  • We should do a DOS campain on any web site promoting such a blaphemy!

  • Bioboy110

    That’s soo tragic! I guess if you must shave your chest, then that’s your own decision, but I forbid anyone from shaving their armpits! That makes me want to cry…

  • sassywench

    How silly. Chest and underarm shavers are like….douchey frat boys.

  • GothamOso

    This is an absolute crime against nature…

  • Nate

    Um, by a show of hands, plese people, who here smiles and laughs and makes orgasmic faces while shaving??

  • Inanna

    As a girl, I can say that really, I want to date a man, not a prepubescent.. any time I see a man that shaves body hair it disturbs me just more than a little – I know a guy that shaves everything, including his arms and head.. and honestly? He reminds me of gollum.. all rubbery and nasty.

    Bring back body hair!

  • Joanna

    This is total blasphemy of the male race. He looks like a little boy now instead of the gorgeous man he was. I feel it It’s almost like looking at a child in child porn!!! My man has to have some hair on his chest and the legs and arms and never, ever would I allow him to shave his ‘jewels’! This s–t has got to be stopped, It’s the ruination of the gorgeous hairy man.

  • Aldo

    The guy from the pics looks like a man-sized Ken doll. Gross….

  • Deed

    Oh, the huMANity…..

  • Curtis

    I like them smooth who wants a mouth full of hair and back hair is the worst gross! I don’t want to hug a bigfoot or grizzly. The guy in the pics after he shaved made him look 20 years younger, now I don’t mind a hairy arm pit but chest and most especially the back must be smooth for me and the pubes must be trimmed closely as well not shaved completely off, but thats just my taste everyone has their own.

  • txguy

    This sickened me. I am a hairy, in shape guy, and I haven’t shaved my body in years. Also, I stopped trimming my pubes and am letting it grow wild down there. It looks and feels great. The only problem I have it it getting caught in my foreskin, but even that’s hot in a weird way…

  • txguy

    also, to clarify I DO have my back waxed regularly. I’m not into hairy backs. Hope that’s not considered a contradiction, but just my taste.

  • The Hatbox Ghost

    OH MY. My eyes just started tearing up. That’s HORRIBLE. Men shaving their chest, and pits, and bush and all that is like vandalism! Someone stop this monstrosity, please! D:

    Trees do NOT look taller when there is no hedges below. THEY LOOK SILLY. SILLY I TELL YOU. skgjslkgjsgdagdhdhdhfhfhjfjfjfaskagjd. My whole night is now disturbed/ruined. Gilette only wants men to shave so they can have the money because so many guys will be like OH, I SHOULD DO IT TO MAKE MY JUNK LOOK BIGGER! So more people will buy razors. Plus it’s not the size that counts, it’s how you use it.

    Now I’m a sadddddd panda. I’d take any hairy man over a shaved man that looks more like a prepubescent teen any day. -sigh-

  • CJ

    OMG, MY EYES!

    It was okay when he was doing the chest (well at least acceptable), but the ARMPITS? HE SHAVED HIS ARMPITS?

  • Harry

    If he’d shaved the chest and left the armpits he would have been perfect.

  • Kevin K

    Sorry…I love a hairy chest (not bear hairy…just normal and natural). In fact, hairy arms, legs, chest and butt are the total turn on…not the bear-type we always get images of…just a natural, toned guy with the fuzz in the right places. And I find no bigger turn-off than seeing a man’s body with no hair where it should be.

  • Alec Finn

    I like men it is nice that men come in all shapes sizes including hairy and smooth. Smooth men are nice but I love to bury my face in a mans hairy chest. Shaving under the arms and below the waist looks like turkey parts before cooking. I am not gay to have a muscular flat chested woman. When I want a female that is what I’ll get. Aside from body builders swimmers divers etc men need to leave their sexiness intact. Companys saw selling more shaving cream as a larger market by getting men to shave their bodies UGH running your fingers over a smooth male crotch is like touching children Unsexy (Shudder) And a Big No Go!!!!

  • Eric

    Seriously? That is an outrage! Men are so much hotter and sexier when they have body hair! Shaving your facial hair (beard, mustache, etc.) is acceptable, even though I’d rather my man have at least some kind of it (2-3 day stubble preferably. lol.), but having none is fine. But shaving the chest, the armpits, and the pubic hair is just wrong! I can, in some circumstances, understand the chest. But the other areas are not an opinion. lol.

  • lawl

    Sorry to all the “hair lovers” but I find body hair to be disgusting. I can tolerate facial hair, I can tolerate pubic hair, I can tolerate armpit hair but chest, back, leg (ass?) hair are nasty to me but to each their own.

  • Johnny

    I love hairy men, and yet I can actually find *naturally* hairless men attractive. It’s the fake ones — trying to be what you aren’t, that’s a huge turn-off. And stubble? YUCK!

    How sad it was when the Navy required shaving their beards, trying to make everyone look just alike. Oh, yeah, that’s why it’s called uniform.

    Other guys shave because they want to hide the grey hairs. I’m fine with the silver bears just the same. And happen to love my husband’s very hairy back. Every way he turns in bed, I’m happy.

    If you want to look like every other guy, go for it. If you want to look like a young boy, go for it. If you want to look like a girl, go for it. When you wise up, it will grow back. Then call me, and we’ll talk.

  • sam

    shaving? because nothing turns me on more than ingrown hairs and red bumps. ugh.

    how about a nice trim? get to know your clipper settings.

  • J. Michael

    Man BODY Hair is freakin’ just plain ol’ school. Get with the times, get yourself a Man Shaver, and git ‘er shaved like only a REAL man can.

  • Me

    I’ll take smooth over hairy any day. Great post.

  • FurryNoWorry

    People, relax.

    This is a stupid fad.

    Sure, more and more men will shave for a while…until they get tired of the scratchy feeling and having to do it ALL THE TIME. They’ll also get tired of the fake feeling “When I’m smooth, I’m hot and clean, but when I’m hairy, I’m dirty and ugly”. That’s insecurity, not confidence. The ones who are truly neurotic and have the money will then move to electrolosis and waxing, but the rest will be thinking “Fuck it. My hair is part of me. If you don’t like it, go diddle yourself to a teen girl’s heartthrob mag.”

    Furry dudes, just stand your ground and give it time. After a while, smooth will be so common that a hot man with a furry chest and legs will suddenly stand out as something different and interesting and therefore more sexy. And it won’t be pitched as “Bigfoot” or “hairy”. It will be pitched as “natural and confident” as opposed to “vain and unnatural”.

    And to the guy who said the model looked 20 years younger…um…how old did you think he looked before? That dude was likely no older than 35 so let’s do the math. If you like 15 or below, go join the widely popular NAMBLA, move to Thailand or get therapy.

    Men with genuinely large penises don’t need to shave their crotches to make them look bigger. And when you lay your head on a furry chest, your ear will NOT stick to it like a suction cup. And can I get another jump for joy over ingrown hairs? No? Thought not.

  • sean

    He looks waaaaay better smooth. Gimme that any day.

  • Matty

    Well you have to look at who they selected to survey. They didn’t do the general population they did a very limited survey of COLLEGE boys. This is highly flawed research since they are attributing its results to the general male population. I think these are the same research people that told Coke they should change their formula based on market research they did. Tisk Tisk.

  • samantha stephens

    it is truly a shame that men actually strip themselves of a secondary sexual charachteristic merely because the shallow sorostitute they bed got a pube in her teeth and said “eeeww…that’s gross”.

  • Emanuel

    Trimming yes, it avoids too much sweat and odors from from forming even if you wash and scrub daily. Shaving is a turn off and guys who do it look like plucked chickens. Not a good look for a grown man.

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  • François

    It looks so unnatural…

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