A New Low on CBS

Just in case you’re feeling a little too nice this week — maybe helped an old lady to cross the street, donated something to charity or saved an ant, balance up all those acts of kindness with these caps aka one way free train tickets to hell. They’re of the spawn of the devil himself — descended to earth in the form of furry Papa Smurf (you know it’s actually Gargamel in disguise), Russell Hantz from the final episode of “Survivor: Heroes vs Villains” last week. Russell has reached a new low and it’s comforting to know that this is the new no-censor limit from CBS. It is quite puzzling to guess what held those pants together, but I would assume it’s his firm buttocks. That being said, it’s clear that he had access to a grooming kit otherwise it wouldn’t be so deserted down there. Oh come on, there are plenty more extra seats available so stop side eyeing me and let’s go!

Russell Hantz Shirtless on Survivor

Russell Hantz Shirtless on Survivor

Russell Hantz Shirtless on Survivor

Russell Hantz Shirtless on Survivor

Russell Hantz Shirtless on Survivor

Russell Hantz Shirtless on Survivor

Russell Hantz Shirtless on Survivor

Russell Hantz Shirtless on Survivor

Russell Hantz Shirtless on Survivor

Russell Hantz Shirtless on Survivor

Russell Hantz Shirtless on Survivor

Russell Hantz Shirtless on Survivor

Russell Hantz Shirtless on Survivor

Russell Hantz Shirtless on Survivor

Russell Hantz Shirtless on Survivor

Russell Hantz Shirtless on Survivor

Russell Hantz Shirtless on Survivor

Russell Hantz Shirtless on Survivor

Russell Hantz Shirtless on Survivor

Russell Hantz Shirtless on Survivor

Russell Hantz Shirtless on Survivor

Russell Hantz Shirtless on Survivor

Russell Hantz Shirtless on Survivor

  • http://twitter.com/marvelboy74 Todd R

    Yeah, after 28 days, even if shaved cleaned, there would have to be something there.

  • WannaBuyADuck

    the guy is creepy — shaved or not.

  • JohnT

    I SHOULD find Russell attractive–he’s handsome, chunky (obviously less so nowadays… he needs to fatten himself back up to his pre-Samoa weight… well, I wouldn’t mind a few dozen pounds beyond that point, either) and hairy, at least when he’s not shaving ALMOST HIS ENTIRE BODY because seriously, even his arm hair grows in over the course of a season.

    But he’s so annoying and I’m so tired of him being on my television screen (LITERALLY 28 STRAIGHT EPISODES OF SURVIVOR) that I simply can’t.

  • Dan

    Gross.

  • squarebart

    It happens: ugly mean men with purdy bodies.

    I do love to hate Russell.

    xB

  • http://eastsidezoo.blogspot.com loudrockmusic

    I can imagine a sweaty scene with him in the secluded Home Depot bathroom, in the back by the plants.

  • robertg

    Oh, lrm, that’s funny!

  • walle

    I really wonder how many pounds Russell lost during his two seasons. :p

    He definitely has a certain appeal about him.

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