Shaved Armpits and Blatant Product Placement: Magic Mike XXL Looks Promising

Channing Tatum in Magic Mike XXL

This post is not even tardy to the party, it’s more like TARDIS to the party but as a bookkeeper of hotness it’s an event that needs to be documented even though everybody has left the party, moved, got a job AND a mortgage. “Magic Mike XXL” is cumming but I have to say the marketing whores aren’t working as hard this time so all we have now is this teaser which will keep a lot of bitches happy for the time being with all the grinding action. All that said, as much as I appreciate Matt Bomer’s exploitation in this second one – I feel like it’s a little bit too much. It’s like you’re given 2 bars of Mars instead of the usual 1 and you can’t handle it. That or I just felt the need to guard his beauty. Still better than being in that “50 Shades of Shit” film anyway. Read more

Magic Mike in Space!

Channing Tatum Shirtless in Jupiter Ascending

If your ideal sexy time involves Legolas in Lord of the Rings, Mr. Tumnus from Narnia with a hint of Jack Sparrow encased in a tight package called Channing Tatum (people are weird like that, I understand) – then today is your lucky day because above is Channing Tatum in “Jupiter Ascending” which features plenty of shirtlessness from what could be the lovechild of the orgy I was never invited to between Legolas, Mr. Tumnus and Jack Sparrow. I’d hit this no doubt, even sans hooves. Watch the trailer for “Jupiter Ascending” after the jump. Read more

This Totally Has Absolutely Nothing To Do With Magic Mike

Yes, I’m being sarcastic here but not once I condemn this act of sluttiness. The whoriest manwhore in Hollywood and his firm, shapely man pecs are out and about on Miami beach (via Socialite Life) doing the mandatory coming-out-from-the-sea-in-slow-mo ‘paparazzi’ shoot, perhaps to compensate his lack of skin in last week’s “True Blood” season premiere? I expect nothing less from Joe Manganiello. Nothing less. His face is conveying “I’m going to make you pregnant. Again.” What a pro. Mark Wright has a lot to learn.

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And Here’s a Bomer-less Trailer of Magic Mike

Channing Tatum Shirtless in Magic Mike Trailer

“Magic Mike” has been shoved in our crotches for a few months now with teasing stills every now and then, finally we have some moving images version featuring Channing Tatum, a scruffy Alex Pettyfer, Matthew McConaughey, a little Joe Manganiello and a hell lot of body wax. It’s all good, but where the hell is Matt Bomer? I bet he’s the only reason many people would want to see this fapping mess. It’s just not fair. We’re talking about quality over quantity here. A milisecond of shirtless Matt Bomer is equivalent to 6 hours of naked Matthew McConaughey. Fact. Read more

Mike Dopud in Stargate Atlantis

Mike Dopud Shirtless

If it were up to me, everyday will be Sudeikis, Krasinski, Rudd or Hamm day. Then again, this website isn’t only about my scrawny ass. It’s all about all of our asses combined! This one here has been requested by akisrob at the forum (see I do fulfill some requests) so I hope he or she will be reading this. Mike Dopud has been in the Hollyweird business for so long as an extra or doing stunts in many films and television series including “300”, “Battlestar Gaylactica” and “Smallville” , so I think it’s time we honor this hot manly pie or at least get his number. Kidding! These are from sci-fi television series “Stargate Atlantis” which of course I never see. All I know is that it has the daddy of my dreams in it. Anyways, when I see that chick place the patch thing-a-magic on his chest, I almost fell off my chair. For a second I thought she’s going to wax that little oasis off! Read more

2013 in (Shirtless) Pictures

2013

Another great year in shirtlessness is coming to an end. As we welcome 2014, let’s join Sweden’s hottest export Alexander Skarsgård lounging in the snow like a true Scandinavian and drool back at some of this year’s top posts according to me. Feel free to add yours in the comments section! Read more

49 Going on 50

Ian Ziering Shirtless

Yes, that is Steve Sanders maturing nicely at 49. Even better, he will Magic Mike his ass entertaining middle age ladies in Las Vegas in June (via US Weekly). Ian Ziering has arrived. I was too busy salivating over Dylan (he was my everything) back in “90210” to cram this prime piece of manbeef into my already crowded libido but it’s always better late than never! Also it’s so good to know that the demand for mature beef is going mainstream. Chest hair doesn’t cope well with Chippendale’s baby oil mix so I think we should cut him some slack. Read more

Discrimination Against Hotness!

DJ Cotrona Shirtless in G.I. Joe: Retaliation

It’s just baffling to me why someone in the right mind would cut this scene off a film. Discrimination against hotness! This hot scene (hotter if Magic Mike and The Rock lose their shirts and start touching each other, of course) featuring a fitter than fit D.J Cotrona and his treasure trail was cut from “G.I. Joe: Retaliation” by hotness hating director Jon M. Chu and was reshot (via Buzzfeed). Some sensible people at Paramount released this still but considering the are ZERO shirtlessness in the film – it’s basically unforgiven! Read more

2012 in (Shirtless) Pictures

2012 Favorites

Because the world didn’t end last week, we shall have the privilege to look back at the year in shirtlessness. And I am giving myself a pat at the back for doing this today, not tomorrow unlike what my procrastinating ass told me to. Despite some absence, this joint has 13 million visits in 2012 according to semi-reliable sources. That’s a lot of drool and a lot of pretending you’re doing the spreadsheet while actually trying hard not to lick the screen. My gratitude. Here are some of my favorite posts of the year. Read more

Best Buttocks in the Business?

Because October 23rd (which is basically Christmas and your birthday all in one) is so fucking far away, we can only be satisfied with these caps of the most beautiful male in all the land, Matt Bomer in the luckiest pair of tangerine thong in the universe which were lovingly (or more appropriately, lustingly) made by Superherofan. I mean, MATT BOMER. THONG. If these are not the best buttocks in the business, then I shall pack up this joint and go home. I hope that Matt Bomer genetics cloning program is going well because when the superior race finally descend to earth to check on their experiment, we should have a lot of Matt Bomers around to show them that it has been very successful. This post contains a lot of bare buttocks so if your workplace has a grudge against male hotness, be warned. Read more